Three Generations. One Family Story.
By the time you reach your 50s or 60s, life rarely moves in just one direction.
You’re looking ahead to retirement while keeping an eye on aging parents. You may also be helping adult children launch careers, buy homes, or start families of their own. In many ways, you’re standing at the center of three generations, balancing both responsibilities and opportunities.
Your financial life likely has become more complex, too. Retirement accounts, investment portfolios, insurance policies, real estate, business interests and charitable goals all play a role. The challenge is not simply managing each piece. It’s making sure they work together.
That’s where estate planning becomes a larger family conversation, not just a collection of legal documents.
In a recent Financial Perspectives conversation, Foster Group Senior Lead Advisor, Ashlee Vieregger, Brown Winick, and member attorney, Katheryn Thorson, discussed why estate planning works best when it’s part of a broader financial strategy. An attorney provides the legal framework. A financial planner helps connect that framework to your assets, beneficiaries and long-term goals. Together, they help ensure the pieces of your plan work toward the same outcome. For many families, that coordination matters most across three important lanes of life.
Lane 1: Build an Estate Planning Foundation That Holds
Before you can help the generations around you, it’s worth asking a simple question: If something happened tomorrow, would your plan work the way you intended?
Many people assume a Last Will & Testament governs everything. In reality, retirement accounts, life insurance policies, and certain other assets often pass according to beneficiary designations or successor ownership arrangements. If those details do not align with your estate documents, the outcome may not match your intentions.
Think of your estate plan as the blueprint and your financial accounts as the building materials. Both matter, but neither accomplishes much without the other. An estate planning attorney creates the legal instructions through documents such as a Last Will & Testament, Powers of Attorney, and, when appropriate, a Trust. A financial planner helps ensure those instructions are reflected in account registrations, beneficiary designations and broader financial decisions.
Together, they could address questions that are easy to overlook today but later may matter greatly. Will a surviving spouse have enough flexibility? Are the right people named to serve in key roles? Could taxes, debt, or ongoing expenses create pressure for loved ones? The most effective plans are not simply signed. They’re regularly maintained. A marriage, divorce, death, relocation, business transition or meaningful financial change could all be reasons to revisit your plan.
Lane 2: Planning for Aging Parents
One of the hardest family conversations isn’t about money, at all. It’s asking your parents how they want to be cared for if they can no longer care for themselves.
Most families would rather avoid the discussion. Yet a health event or unexpected crisis is often the worst time to begin searching for documents, locating accounts, or determining who has authority to make decisions. The goal isn’t to take control; it’s to understand your parents’ wishes while they can clearly express them.
Simple questions could open the door:
- If you needed help, who would you want to step in?
- Where do you keep important documents?
- Who should be contacted first in an emergency?
An estate planning attorney could review your Powers of Attorney, Healthcare Directive, Last Will & Testament, and Trust. A financial planner could help organize accounts, insurance policies, expenses and trusted contacts while considering how future care needs might affect available resources. With your parents’ permission, those professionals could help clarify who has authority to act, what resources are available and how family members could prepare before decisions have to be made under pressure.
Preparation doesn’t diminish independence. Often, it helps preserve it. Even a simple list of key contacts, account locations and recurring bills could spare a family hours of confusion during a stressful time.
Lane 3: Leave a Legacy, Not Just an Inheritance
Every parent hopes to leave something behind. The real question is: what? Money could create opportunities, but values and preparation often have the greatest lasting impact.
Receiving wealth and managing wealth are not the same thing. Financial confidence is built over time, through conversations, experiences, and small decisions. Children may begin learning through an allowance. Teenagers with earned income could start saving and investing. Adult children could participate in conversations about charitable giving, stewardship, and the responsibilities that come with managing abundant family resources.
You don’t need to disclose every account balance or promise an inheritance. What often matters more is sharing the stories and values behind your decisions to help the next generation understand the purpose of your planning.
An attorney may recommend trusts, staggered distributions, or added protections for beneficiaries with unique circumstances. A financial planner could help evaluate how those strategies fit alongside retirement goals, gifting plans, and broader family objectives while helping younger family members develop financial skills.
One often-overlooked milestone comes at age 18. At that point, parents generally lose automatic access to an adult child’s medical and financial information. Simple Healthcare and Financial Powers of Attorney are worth discussing before a child leaves for college, starts a career, or moves away from home.
One Plan, Working Together
The years often described as the “sandwich generation” could feel demanding, but they also offer a unique opportunity. Few stages of life place you at the intersection of your parents’ legacy, your own future, and your children’s beginnings.
Estate planning is not simply about deciding where assets go. It’s about creating clarity for the people you care about most. Attorneys and financial planners serve different roles. The attorney puts your wishes into legal form. The planner connects those instructions to your assets, cash flow, taxes, and family priorities, then helps put those decisions into action. The value isn’t in having more people involved. It’s in having the right people working from the same information.
At your next planning review, bring your estate documents and a current list of account owners and beneficiaries. Ask what needs updating, what remains unfinished and whether your attorney and planner should connect directly. A simple conversation today could help ensure that your plans for yourself, your parents, and the next generation all fit together tomorrow. At Foster Group, truly caring for our clients means taking the time to learn what’s in their hearts and helping them pursue their goals.
